I do not like change.
My OCD does not like change.
Yesterday, my sister left for University. Unlike me, who chose to live at home whilst studying, but that's an entirely different blog entry, she has moved out of our house and gone to live miles away; perhaps an hour and a half by train.
I've had a year to prepare for this eventuality. I've even known where she's been headed for about six months. I've had plenty of time to prepare myself for the goodbyes and spending days without her. So why is it so difficult to accept that she's gone?
I've not had a brilliant day. My poor friend has sprained her ankle, and I must have nearly knocked her off her crutches about three times so that I didn't have to walk on the darker blue strips at the sides of the corridors in the hospital. It's at times like that that I wish I was normal!
I have, however, not cried since this morning. So I guess that's a start?
Oh, Kate, I'm so sorry about your sister moving away. Of course you are sad. That is totally normal. Just because you had plenty of time to prepare for it, it doesn't take the pain away of her leaving. It will certainly be an adjustment for you. Give yourself time and be gentle with yourself. It is a hard transition to watch someone you love move away. I experienced that myself several years ago when my child left for university. It was really tough for a few months, but I'm ok with it now. Still miss my child of course, but I can cope just fine. Hang in there. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteThankyou so much for making me feel more normal! The worst thing is that I know I've got to let her go, especially since she's been my voice of reason for such a long time - she tells me whether something's normal, and she's the one who listens to my anxieties and tells me what to do.
ReplyDeleteBut she's coming home in a fortnight, so that's something positive to focus on!
Change is so so hard!
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